Divorcing Narcissist: One Mom's Battle

In society today, divorce has become relatively common. However, when you are dealing with a narcissistic partner, the battle takes on a whole new level of complexity. This article delves into the experience of one brave mother who faced numerous challenges during her journey to separate from her narcissistic ex-spouse.

The Abusive Cycle Begins

Our protagonist, whom we will refer to as Jane, had once thought her husband, John, was her Prince Charming. They had a whirlwind romance that resulted in marriage and two beautiful children. However, as time went on, Jane started to notice subtle signs of manipulation and gaslighting.

John's narcissistic traits began to overshadow their lives. He constantly belittled Jane, undermined her decisions, and isolated her from her friends and family. The emotional abuse escalated, leading Jane to consider divorce as her only way out.

Divorcing a Narcissist: One Mom's Battle

by Tina Swithin(Kindle Edition)

4.7 out of 5

Language	:	English
File size	:	1610 KB
Text-to-Speech	:	Enabled
Screen Reader	:	Supported
Enhanced typesetting	:	Enabled
Word Wise	:	Enabled
Print length	:	266 pages

FREE

Legal Complexities

Divorcing a narcissist can be an arduous legal battle. Narcissists are known for their ability to twist the truth and manipulate situations to their advantage. Jane quickly learned that she would need to gather substantial evidence of John's abusive behavior to present a strong case in court.

Throughout the divorce proceedings, John continued playing mind games with Jane. He would intentionally delay court hearings, misrepresent facts, and use the children as pawns in his manipulation. Jane's lawyer advised her to remain calm and focused, ensuring that her integrity remained intact.

Custody Wars

One of the most challenging parts of divorcing a narcissist is the intense custody battle that often ensues. Narcissists are determined to maintain control over their ex-partner, and they may use the children as a means to achieve this. Jane found herself constantly fighting for her parental rights, as John attempted to paint her as an unfit mother.

The court appointed a custody evaluator to assess the situation. Jane provided evidence of John's emotional abuse, control tactics, and neglect of the children. Eventually, the evaluator recognized the toxic environment created by John and recommended sole custody to Jane with supervised visitation for John.

Maintaining Emotional Well-being

Divorcing a narcissist can take a toll on one's mental and emotional health. Jane realized the importance of finding support during this challenging period. She sought therapy, joined support groups for survivors of narcissistic abuse, and surrounded herself with a strong support network.

By prioritizing self-care, Jane was able to rebuild her confidence and regain control over her life. She learned to set boundaries and disengage from John's attempts to disrupt her peace.

Moving Forward

Despite the numerous obstacles she faced, Jane eventually obtained her divorce from John. She successfully broke free from his narcissistic web and started a new chapter in her life. However, the battle did not end there.

Co-parenting with a narcissistic ex-spouse continues to present challenges. Jane remains vigilant in protecting her children's emotional well-being and attends co-parenting counseling to establish healthy boundaries and effective communication.

Divorcing a narcissist is undeniably difficult, especially for a mother fighting to protect her children. However, through unwavering strength and determination, Jane battled against the odds and survived.

This article serves as a reminder that no one should face such adversity alone. There is support available, and it is crucial to reach out for help during this challenging process. Divorcing a narcissist may be an uphill struggle, but it is a battle worth fighting for the sake of one's own well-being and the well-being of the children involved.

Divorcing a Narcissist: One Mom's Battle

by Tina Swithin(Kindle Edition)

4.7 out of 5

Language	:	English
File size	:	1610 KB
Text-to-Speech	:	Enabled
Screen Reader	:	Supported
Enhanced typesetting	:	Enabled
Word Wise	:	Enabled
Print length	:	266 pages

FREE

Tina Swithin was swept off her feet by a modern-day Prince Charming. The relationship moved quickly and after 18 months, they were married. It wasn’t long before Tina discovered that her fairytale was built on lies, fraud and deception. This wasn’t the man she married, or was it?

In her book, Tina will explain how a smart, independent woman can fall prey to a narcissist. Tina discusses the red flag reflections that she didn’t initially recognize with the hope of educating others on the warning signs that she missed. Sometimes, giving the benefit of the doubt and trying to see the best in others comes at a great cost.

After seven years of marriage, Tina found herself in a therapist’s office. For years, she had been told by her husband that she was the problem. That day, her therapist delivered three life-changing words; “narcissistic personality disorder.” Initially unable to accept that she could not fix her marriage or her husband, Tina began to research narcissism and personality disorders while connecting with experts around the world.

Tina soon discovered that there is only one thing more difficult than being married to a narcissist and that is divorcing a narcissist. When Tina’s plight to protect her children began, she was forced to act as her own attorney due to severe financial abuse. Through her nightmarish journey through the family court system, Tina discovered a flawed system that prioritized her ex-husband’s parental rights over her children’s rights to safety. Tina experienced repeated institutional betrayal at the hands of child welfare services, law enforcement, child custody evaluators, minor’s counsel and judicial officers yet, she refused to give up.

Tina refused to accept that shared parenting, or 50-50 custody arrangements were in her daughter’s best interest, and she set her sights on learning the system inside and out. Tina became a fixture in the courthouse and at hearings, studying high-conflict cases that were similar to hers, watching court proceedings, talking to attorneys in the court hallways. A painful realization was that to the court system, her custody battle was just a business transaction and a case number. Through radical acceptance and with her growing knowledge of the family court system, Tina began to embrace the importance strategy versus emotion.

Tina’s story is the story of one mom’s battle to protect her children in the patriarchal, antiquated family court system but, her story is the story of thousands of mothers around the world. There are identifiable patterns and trends of the family court system’s failure to recognize coercive control as domestic violence and the overall lack of training within the system on domestic violence, narcissism and post separation abuse. Tina’s story shines a glaring light on the darkness that is the present-day family court system and highlights the need for education, intervention and court reform.

Tina’s story showcases the harsh, painful reality that victims of domestic violence face when they make the brave decision to leave their abuser. As readers will discover, the abuser’s need for power and control doesn't mysteriously vanish or dissipate when the relationship ends. Much of the time, the perpetrator is triggered by the loss of control and their efforts to maintain power and control intensifies. Post separation abuse continues to escalate and often, far surpasses the abuse that victims were subjected to while under the same roof as their abuser. After the relationship ends, the perpetrator sets their sights on the child(ren) to exert control. In these situations, the children become pawns and weapons to the abuser.

By many, Tina Swithin is considered to be one of the lucky ones for finally securing peace and safety for her family. For anyone to read about Tina’s ten-year battle to protect her children and label her as “lucky” speaks volumes about the brokenness of the family court system.